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Sunday, August 22, 2010

Entering the Sick Phase

When I was pregnant with Chloe I redefined the stages of pregnancy.  I never finished it, so I never published it on Chloe's blog--but now that I am entering week 9--it is official--nausea is here and I find myself going back to my old "notes" to see what to expect next. 

Stages of Pregnancy
Weeks 4-7 Shock: This stage starts at week 4 because before that—you won’t know you are pregnant yet. Unless you are one of those girls who can “just knew they were pregnant immediately”. For me it was the BFP (Big Fat Positive) on the 6 pregnancy tests I took and the doctor’s office confirmation until I was fully convinced. It is a weird stage because you don’t know what to do with yourself. The doctor office staff may tell you that the doctor wants to see you at 8 weeks. If this is worrisome to you—do what I did—just start crying and tell them that you have no idea what you are doing and they’ll get you in at 6 weeks.

The Shock phase may also have you wondering how to tell people you are pregnant. Some people I guess can keep it to themselves, but we had to share with a few friends. It was hard to say the words-I’m pregnant—so we chose the ever popular—email. Then once the heartbeat was confirmed—we shared with our parents and close family over the telephone and in person. If you don’t spread the word—you may have some suspicious friends who will notice that you are holding a beer in your hand, but have never taken a sip of it. So if you are trying to hide it—come up with a game plan.

Weeks 8-16 Sick: Just when you think—boy I should feel something—BOOM it hits you. I thought morning sickness would be, wake up, barf, get on with your day—NO! It is more like all day nausea leaving you craving carbs, dry heaving, and taking naps at work (I chose to go to my car in the nice dark parking garage and reclining my seat all the way back). Then sick stage phase 2 hits—the immediate throw up. You’ll know your in the second phase of sickness, when you “oh my god---I’m going to throw up right now---where’s the nearest toilet---blaaahhh” yes pregnancy is a beautiful time. There is also constipation, headaches, and fatigue (did I mention sleeping in my car). Everyone who’s been there will tell you this will all pass—but you may feel like you are dying and may have to kill yourself as you won’t last the 9 months anyway. But , finally, you’ll start to feel better and only throw up every 3-4 days. And then one day it will be gone.

Weeks 16-21 Fat: The second trimester is supposed to be the fitness trimester or the energy trimester, but I call it the fat trimester. By now though there is no reason to not start telling people or you can leave them wondering---is she…pregnant or…..just getting fat. After all that carb eating during the sick stage—you may have gained up to 10 pounds or so and everyone will say it is OK, you are eating for two, but the fact is that you didn’t probably need to gain any weight up to this point and now your boobs feel like they weigh 5 pounds each and your pants don’t button. You don’t look pregnant, just fat. Go out and start buying those maternity clothes—you may be dreading it, but it does make you feel good to have clothes that fit.

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